Saturday, September 20, 2008

Fuck other countries Philippines is the best.

These may sound a bit harsh but having resided in this country (Philippines) for 27 years(but technically I've spent my 27th in the very lively, very clean and nice place "Saudi Arabia" fuck off) , i must admit that some of these things are true. well, it really depends on how you want to see your world but read on and maybe you would be able to relate to some of it:

in is the only place on earth where…

1. every street has a basketball court.

2. even doctors, lawyers and engineers are unemployed.

3. doctors study to become nurses for employment abroad.

4. students pay more money than they will earn afterwards.

5. school is considered the second home and the mall considered the third.

6. call-center employees earn more money than teachers and nurses.

7. everyone has his personal ghost story and superstition.

8. mountains like Makiling and Banahaw are considered holy places.

9. everything can be forged.

10. all kinds of animals are edible. (specially dog and rat)

11. starbucks coffee is more expensive than gas.

12. driving 4 kms can take as much as four hours.

13. police officers and criminals are both dangerous.

14. crossing the street involves running for your dear life.

15. the personal computer is mainly used for games, Yahoo Messenger and Friendster.

16. where colonial mentality is dishonestly denied!

17. where 4 a.m. is not even considered bedtime yet.

18. people can pay to defy the law.

19. everything and everyone is spoofed.

20. where even the poverty-stricken get to wear Ralph Lauren and Tommy Hilfiger (peke)!

21. the honking of car horns is a way of life.

22. being called a bum is never offensive.(its a compliment)

23. floodwaters take up more than 90 percent of the streets during the rainy season.

24. where everyone has a relative abroad who keeps them alive.

25. where wearing your national colors make you baduy.

26. where even the poverty-stricken have the latest cell phones. (GSM-galing sa magnanakaw)

27. where insurance does not work.

28. where water can only be classified as tap and dirty. (tubig kanal)

29. clean water is for sale.

30. where the government makes the people pray for miracles.(fuck government)

31. where University of the Philippines is where all the weird people go.

32. Ateneo is where all the nerds go.

33. La Salle is where all the Chinese go.

34. College of Saint Benilde is where all the stupid Chinese go.

35. University of Asia and the Pacific is where all the irrelevantly rich people go.

36. fast food is a diet meal.

37. traffic signs are merely suggestions, not regulations.

38. where being mugged is normal and it happens to everyone.

39. rodents are normal house pets.

40. the definition of traffic is the ‘non-movement’ of vehicles.

41. where the fighter planes of the 1940s are used for military engagements and -

42. the new fighter planes are displayed in museums.

43. where alcohol and cigarettes are a necessity and where lottery is a commodity.

44. where soap operas tell the realities of life and where the news provides the drama.

45. where actors make the rules and where politicians provide the entertainment.

46. people can get away with stealing trillions of pesos but not a thousand.

47. where being an hour late is still considered punctual.

48. where the squatters have more to complain (even if they do not pay their tax and they have air condition unit.).

49. and where everyone wants to leave the country!

50. most of all, we elect president and we protest to oust him/her.

Fuck other country,,,,only in the Philippines yan mga tsong........

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

funny and true